Friday, December 30, 2016

Um, so about 2016...

Kind of skipped blogging altogether in 2016 now didn't I?

Where in entertainment deaths I'd like to forget ALL about 2016...overall it was a pretty interesting year in the life of the Suze.

Let's back up a little into 2015 mmk? So November 2015 I had surgery. Tubal Reversal surgery b/c despite the fact that I had my tubes "tied" back in 2010...we all felt like something/someone(s) was missing. The surgery was a roaring success and I was very barely pregnant by Feb 2016 when we headed to our third Disney way of San Juan! I didn't have confirmation of that until we got back from the cruise...but kind of had that "mama sense" about it.

We had another litter of gigantic Irish Wolfhound puppies in April, always an exciting and fun time to get to see those guys develop and grow (so quickly!).

I'll detail out  more of the pregnancy story later, but it didn't go quite as my previous ones had. Around 15 weeks I got this pesky little rashes on my hips. So I went to a primary care (who had no answer) and asked my OB about it. The OB du jour is married to a dermatologist, so he took pics of said rashes and sent them to his wifey poo, who wanted to see me about them. Over that weekend the rashes went from small and pesky to covering 70% of my body in thousands of fire hot tiny blisters..and I was in misery!
Cliff notes version (for now) is that I got diagnosed with a super rare (1 in 50k) pregnant woman only auto immune disease and smacked with a HIGH dose of steroids to keep the super scary rash at bay.

My moderate/normal pregnancy weight gain at that point jumped dramatically (thanks steroids) as did my risk factors since the steriods/auto immune disease can lead to pre mature delivery..of which I was already getting weekly shot of Progesterone to KEEP me pregnant since kid #2 was a 35 week delivery.

It was a long, hot, itchy, summer. I tried to power through the not esp difficult, but just exceedingly uncomfortable pregnancy. I kept the thought in my head of "as long as this little boy is ok" (ps, totally a boy baby). That was my goal. That was my safe thought. That was where my mind retreated millions of times a day, my safe harbor.

September 17, 5 weeks before my due date, hours after I'd had my shot, and a day after I'd spent the afternoon in the hospital for observation (crying b/c I was so done at that point)-my water broke and our 3rd child made his long awaited debut! Totally healthy, totally tiny.

And now 3 months later? We're trying to get HIM to gain weight..while I'm freaking out that my previous 46lb weight loss goal has jumped to a 70-80lb goal. Yikes. Pregnancy+Steroids, didn't do my body good.

I started tracking meals and measurements in a cute little copper and aqua notebook on 11/29/16...and by 12/29 when I rechecked my measurements..despite being almost exclusively low carb (with the exception of holiday meals)-I had GAINED a lb...but had lost like 6 inches over all.

A coworker of mine (while I was out on maternity leave) started a nutrition program and by the time I got back was looking amazing...and another friend of mine (same program) had made astonishing I'm jumping on the bandwagon and seeing if I can have the same results!  It's one of those shake/shake/meal programs, but super clean and it's ok for me to do while I'm breastfeeding the little guy and trying to get him to bulk up..while I (hopefully) slim down!

I'm planning more posts on the auto immune suck fest, keeping up with my food tracking/new nutrition program, and general daily fun stuff!

Ready or not, here comes 2017!!

Monday, February 2, 2015

Almost 50

So remember, I said AFTER the cruise...right?'s after the cruise..time to get to it!

Previous, on Instagram (@mairzdotes) I posted my first before/after picture. Really not thinking I'd lost. To me...I'm 'only' about 20ish lbs from where I was almost 5 years ago. I guess I didn't really, realize HOW drastic that 20ish lbs was.
Me on left 2010 approx 215lbs on right Jan 2015 approx 190
Now, I get it, I still have a looooooong way to go.
I went ahead and weighed in yesterday (February 1) like I said I would and it wasn't where I wanted it to be.
But it didn't surprise me either. I know I have work to do.
Almost 50lbs of work....but not 50lbs of work.
As much as I whine and complain about needing to lose weight. I've started looking on a slight bright side (if I can call it that).
Yes...according to my BMI..I'm 'obese'...but I have UNDER 50lbs that I need to lose. I don't have 80, 100, 150lbs to lose.  It almost seems silly to me that I've waited this long to kick my ass into gear.

I'd LOVE for February to be a great kick-off at least lose 10lb AWESOME would that be?!
 But how hard would I have to work for it?
  And WILL I do it?
I'm going to be weighing in on Sundays. A vague attempt at trying to keep our weekend eating in check (No, Suze, don't overeat on Friday and Saturday b/c you have to weigh in on Sunday!). I'll try my best to post how that weigh in goes. And have a big monthly recap.

I have a renewed sense of determination...which is almost scary. I have goals. They are yet to be revealed with the interwebs because until I see that I'm making a dent in this 'almost 50' I don't want to psych myself out too much.

My biggest goals right now?
-Remove a number....that 4 has been sitting in front of the 'lbs to go' for far too long. I'd much rather only have 30-some-odd-lbs to lose than 46.6 (or 40 anything).
-No peeking in between weigh ins...I'm BAD about that...I'll see a bit of progress and I'll see it as 'wiggle room' (chips and queso) and self sabotage.
-Exercise. I have an elliptical. Right in my freakin' living room. In front of my tv...I have NO excuse not to get on least 30 minutes, at least a few times a week.

We had a FANTASTIC time on our cruise. I really can't say enough good things about Disney Cruise Line! I strongly suggest that anyone go. Young, old, married, single, kids, no kids, doesn't's amazing. This was Disney Cruise #2 for us...and I can't wait for #3!!

Friday, January 2, 2015

Well, 2015...Welcome!

So...I haven't blogged since March of 2014. And I'd like to say that so much has changed. I'd like to report that I've lost 50lbs, that I'm tan, and have not a care in the world...but I don't really like lying to people. Here's the truth...
The weight- From March to now.... down .2. *sigh* And here I thought I was doing good. Until I decide "hey, start blogging again!" and see that I haven't really made any 'scale' progress. BUT I have made ME progress. I really have..despite the fact that it isn't showing on the scale.

I got a FitBit (well, it was a gift from a friend)..and I love it..I wear it allthetime. I track my food, I try to get my steps. During the summer I was walking allthetime. And no, the scale didn't move really...but my body changed a bit and I was feeling great. That's something, right?
So I'm choosing not to focus on the fact that I'm reporting (truthfully) that the scale hasn't only changed a mere .2 as 'ok'. As in...I could have GAINED 20lbs, 40lbs. I could be further off the mark than I am now. I could feel terrible. I could have no idea at all of where I'm going and how I want to get there...but I do...
Here is my plan (for the next couple of weeks)-
My 'dieting'...the 'crash' portion of my plan started RIGHT after Christmas...December 26th...when all the leftovers were calling my name. But...I made the choice to go low carb until we leave on our #2 Disney Cruise...1/17..well we leave KC on the 17th, board the ship on the 18th..either carbs  until then. And so far...a week into it...I'm down 3.4 pounds (on 12/26 I was in at 192.2, today 188.8). I'm not expecting a Disney Magic Miracle before the cruise. And I should have gotten my ass in gear LONG before now (because it's not like I haven't known about the cruise for well over a year now)..I didn't, and that's no one's fault but my own.

As far as resolutions for the year? I'm going to jump into those more AFTER the cruise...and I do plan on hitting them harder than I did last year!
I'm hoping to be better at blogging this year...I've falling in LOVE with Instagram and the awesome community of super encouraging people I've met (I'm on there as @mairzdotes)

Can I get back to the cruise for a second? I'm soooooo ready for it? body isn't...but my mind is! Missouri weather has been so gloomy for the past month or more..and cold of course (Hi December/January). I'm ready for sun...I'm ready for warm...I'm ready for poolside and relaxing!! Not trying to wish my life away, but these next two weeks really CAN'T go by fast enough!!!

Happy New Year!

Thursday, March 6, 2014

Draggin' behind the wagon...

If you feel like this is a repeat post, it's probably because it is...because I' known to 'fall' off the wagon.

I feel like I look like Jabba. Sweet mercy, *sigh* by 'fall' off the wagon I might mean, and totally admit to eating copious amounts of mexican food and McDs multiple times over the past couple weeks out of stress and sad since my 14 year old cat died. Can I get 'aw' there? She was my buddy...and I'm miss her errday.
I'll post of picture of her,once I get past the 'hurts to see a picture' phase.
Moooooovin' on (get it, b/c I feel like a cow?)...
I got BACK on the wagon (for the 1,147th time) earlier this week..Monday of course...we always start on Monday's don't we?
I've been tracking everything I put in my mouth on MyFitnessPal and staying under or as close to my 1200 calorie allotment as possible.  And my weight WAS in the 190s (NOOOO!) Tuesday...but this morning I weighed in at 189.

And where it is SMALL progress, and I'm still smacking myself b/c a mere 6mo ago I'd gotten down to like 173...I'll get back there. And I actually feel like I'm really back. No, really.

Might help that I have some AWE-some people to look up to while I'm trying to be good. There are so many great women out there blogging their journeys too, and even though we don't know one another..those girls push me, and I love it. I can't wait to be posting the 'after' pics of my progress.

Coming soon, I promise.

Monday, December 30, 2013

Resolutions start....NOW!

I know that the first isn't until Wednesday, day after tomorrow,'s soon enough..right?
In no certain order...
*READ-at LEAST 52 books
                    I love, Love, L.O.V.E., to read...but alot of the time I don't get to. I have kid stuff to do, I have tenant stuff to do, I have job stuff to do, I'm just too effin' tired, I'd rather watch something on the DVR..Heaven forbid I workout, ammIright? But At LEAST 52. I have 48 on my bookshelf behind me right now..but I know I've read at least 14 of them. But there are specifics to the I need to get The Book of Mormon in there at least once. I need to put some classics in there Charles Dickens. I don't want to limit myself to what I usually read..I want to read alot of different things. Really? I'd love to double the goal and hit 104 in 2014..what?! We'll see.                

                                                *Keep it CLEAN
           We just built our 'new' house last fact today marks ONE year that we've been here. And where I've done a pretty good job of cleaning it acceptable, I'd like it to feel clean. Despite the fact that we have 5 cats (yes, we are insane) I don't want people to 'know' (by nose) that we have them. I want to try to teach my kids to help me clean too. I don't want my house to be one of those antiseptic "don't touch anything" houses, because I long to be the house that EVERYONE feels comfortable in...but I also hate telling people they need to carry a lint roller to sit on my furniture b/c of the dog hair. Eesh..costs of pets I guess.

                                          *WORK out...
        Holy crap, this one scares me so bad. I have this DVD. I have this DVD and about 12 (not kidding) others-Walk away the Pounds, all sorts of 10 minute trainer ones, etc. And I don't do them. I 'said' I would start doing them when I got into the 170s and didn't. I got into the 170s and ate my way back up into the 180s. I don't like working out 'in front' of people..even my own husband and kids, and I need to get over that. Because I'd probably get back to the 170s and lower IF I worked out (and ate right), dontcha think? Also Holly is doing a Jillian Challenge..I'm scared to pieces to join..but I kinda want to.

                                       *LET THEM GO...
          I say THEM, I really only have one in mind. But it's a 'friend' that I feel like I'm constantly reaching for and they are never reaching back. I get that we are both busy, we both have kids, we both have spouses/or spouse-like people. But I get the feeling like the friendship was much more to me, than it was to them. And it's a bummer. But it's a thing that holds me back..and I don't want to do that anymore.

                                       *STICK to it/WEIGHT Loss
     I'm far from being on their infomercial..but the Slim4Life program does work..if YOU stick to it. I've sucked at it lately..but no more. It's not a hard program. It's not rocket surgery. They don't ask too much of you. And I've chosen it as my 'way' to lose weight. And I'm going to do it.

                              *BE HAPPY...
   I struggle with Happy. I really do. Even though I'm medicated and have everything in the world I could want..I struggle. My Mom struggled too, and where I'm not blaming her for 'my' lack of happy..I don't think it helped. And that little gal in the pic with me..that's my girl..and I want her to have a happy Momma..(I want that for my boy too..I just don't have a cute picture of the two of us to put up) I think I deserve to be happy. I think we all do.

What are YOUR resolutions? Or do you make any??
Happy New Year! A couple days early!

Thursday, December 26, 2013

Post Christmas Purge

No real pukin' this is a safe space.
Although I did almost eat myself sick on spiral ham (aka chewy salt lick)...and day one ( back on the wagon (for the zillionth time)..all I want is a slice of bread..ok..a piece of toast with butter AND peanut butter...let's be honest. But I think I'm craving the bread so it can suck up all the salt in my the trick of putting a peeled potato in a pot of soup if you oversalted...see? see? You learned something huh?
Somewhere between getting home from the cruise, tenant catastrophes, and holidays..I've lost the charger for my my Christmas pics are blurry iphone pics..and I'm not too happy about that. Esp since this was our first Christmas in our new house. Last year we were displaced b/c the house wasn't ready yet and did Christmas at the in-laws.
Moving on to a couple random topics-
iphone...I know I'm one of the last people on the planet to get one (got it for my birthday in October)..but I love favorite apps lately are Bandcamp (where I have ALL The Lower Lights albums) and Lose It! (where I can track all the stuff I put in my mouth). I the only one that the day AFTER Christmas they turn into cranky-whiney-demons after they've had the BEST day? My kids don't respond well to over stimulation I guess *shrugs*
cruise...all signs point to us becoming QUITE the cruising family..and I'm totally ok with that..>Disney Cruise #2 scheduled for January yes...I have to wait over a year...but totally worth it.
Hope you all had amazing Christmases and Holidays with those who are most special to you!

Monday, December 2, 2013

Back at it

 Here are a couple of pics, just because I suck at posting pics...and sometimes it's nice to 'see' who is talking to you, amIright? The top pic is myself and my mini-me. Who wants her two front teeth for Christmas. And where my Mother-in-law jokingly says she 'hopes they never come in', I miss the teeth!
Family pic, last day on the ship! 10lbs heavier than when we started (all in my face, bleh!)-but it was an amazing vacation. Hands down best ever. Want to/will do it again..and again..and again. As many times as we can. We all loved it!!

And then back to reality!
I came back to 3 vacant properties, and a message from a tenant stating they were going to be moving out...make that 4 vacant properties. Two of which needed/wanted HUD inspections (read-headache).
Oh..and the 10lbs of cruise weight.
Well...two weeks later I am happy to report that the houses are 'almost' done. I've gotten leases, deposits, tenants, etc figured out and things look *knocks on wood* ok for the moment. But in the landlording world, that can change, and so quickly!

Re: my weight. Well...luckily (and then again not so) I was already 'up' at my last weigh in with Slim 4 Life, so when I checked in with them, I was only up 3lbs..instead of 10..good right?
I decided to enjoy one last weekend...we did Thanksgiving with my parents, so we did a Saturday with his parents (our parents do not mix..which makes for lots of akward scheduling)-We went and saw Frozen..loved it. Then grabbed some real italian food. Then Sunday we grabbed brunch with a friend before heading to the Chiefs game. Normally we aren't big footballers, but I do love my Manning boys, and the weather was great! Plus the Broncos won! Sorry KC, I did feel bad cheering for blue in a sea of red, but the heart wants what the heart wants!

Today...back on the wagon. I've weighed and will stick to eating healthy/well..because I am going to say goodbye to the 180s soon. For the record this morning was-
184.6 (boo, hiss!).

So...goal...back to the 170s, and beyond! (Sorry, our boy is full on into the Toy Story phase)

How was YOUR weekend? Have you ever been on a cruise (Disney or other)? Would you go again?